Why I Am Not Exceptionally Homesick

I just skimmed over google news, and almost every headline frustrated me in its pettiness.  I don't pay a whole lot of attention to the news here, and when I do, I'm not always sure I'm understanding it all since it's in French, but I think I can confidently say that American news is filled with more than twice as much junk as Senegalese news, something I am not looking forward to returning to.  Good thing I'm here for six  more months!
To give you an idea of what I'm talking about, here are some of my "favorite" headlines:

• Oil Spill Still A Drain On BP Earnings

  Forbes 

Is this really news?  I, for one, wasn't surprised to learn that the biggest oil spill in the history of the petroleum industry (source) is still affecting the company responsible for it.

• More High-Calorie Drinks Available In Schools

  OzarksFirst.com 

Ok, concerned parents, stop complaining about the availability of unhealthful food products and do something about it.  What I mean to say is, when you stop buying soda for your kids (or giving them extra money when they go to school), they will stop drinking it.  Please keep the complaints limited to PTA meetings.  Also, did anyone stop to ask if this increase may have good benefits?  For example, the beverage companies whose machines are spewing liquid death to helpless public school children actually have contracts with the schools, meaning that a percentage of the revenue from the drinks funds school programs, including school sports and P.E. and health classes (Check out the Pepsi Refresh Project and some of it's impacts)

• A Fight Sent Demi Lovato to Rehab

  People Magazine 
  and

  
  

  Charlie Sheen Reveals Broken Marriage, Seeks Custody in Divorce Documents

  ABC News 

It's not that I think the personal life of a middle aged movie star or the psychological issues of a teenage disney star are unimportant - I will even concede that young Demi probably influenced my childhood via her role on the beloved children's show Barney & Friends - I just don't think that they are front page google news worthy.  Save these stories for the E!
network.

• Who saved the day in Yemen bomb plot? Once again, a Muslim.

  Christian Science Monitor 

This headline frustrates me because of its apparent necessity.  I am inclined to demand, "is it really shocking enough to Americans that a muslim would do something good to make it the headline?"  And, sadly, the response is apparently "yes."  The existence of this headline severely dampens my habitually optimistic conceptions of America and its people.